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♥ z h i h u i * b l o g ♥
Wednesday, August 04, 2004

im soo tired.. drained out.. felt so lethargic as daes passed.. on e verge of breakin down.. dyin soon.. dead.

had been rushin projects these few weeks.. n had to go all e way frm je to potong pasir to complete e project.. out of my clique of 5 friends, 3 lived in e east side of singapore.. -.-" so far.. took me bout 1hr plus to travel.. mon to wed are e worst daes of my week.. always got home late.. tue got french lesson (bonjour~ -.-") whereas mon n wed got band which ends up always dismissin at around 10 or so.. reached home, eat, bathe n stuffs, it was already 12 plus.. n i hadnt even touched on my hw yet! always by tat time, my eyelids will be real heavy.. concentration level really low.. hard to tink properly n concentrate well on hw.. wats more, fernando teach DNA until so chim.. don even understand a single shit.. wat guanine wat cytosine one..?? i donno.. *shruggs*

feelin really stressed.. ICA startin this sat.. i haven revised yet! haix.. stressed.. *sweat* so much so of e stress-ness, i got headache in e end.. its been gettin frm bad to worse.. n its still gettin worse as e time goes by.. im startin to hav runnin nose n blocked nose.. fever can be predicted in few daes' time.. dear n few others asked me to eat medicine but i don wan.. don like medicine at all.. tink i'd rather die than eatin those horrible stuffs..

toked to dear juz now.. n all of a sudden.. i was bein woken up by wat he said..

dear: y u headache? too stressed ahz?
me: i donno.. shld be loh.. always come home late.. no time to do hw...
dear: y come home late? don go for cca loh..
me: cannot.. if don go band for 4 pracs for one semester, then cannot perform liaox..
dear: wa laoz.. u would rather sacrifice study than performance meh?

tat last sentence suddenly hit me hard on my head.. wakin me up frm e lala land tat ive always been in.. ya.. its true.. n i din realised tat ive been neglectin my studies for band.. im repeatin my secondary sch's lifestyle.. had been remindin myself to focus hard on my studies since im in poly now.. chances of gettin into uni are much more tougher than a jc student.. but wat have i done to land myself into this mess? had sunk into a deep hole of ignorance towards my studies in e past.. don wan history to repeat again n yet, its e habit of mine tats hard to change..

ive been slackin too much.. its e fear of bein unable to catch up wif my work tat im afraid of.. god bless me.. ahmituofuo~

♥ 12:06 AM ♥